My Progress on Jillian Michael's Program

Today was a good day. It didn't start out so great as we found this morning some teenagers thought it would be fun to play baseball with our mail box. My day however did get better. I've been on Jillian's program now for two weeks. The workouts are intense but worth it. I love the challenge of a good workout but most importantly I LOVE TO SEE THE GREAT RESULTS of my hard work! I weighed in this morning and lost just under 2lbs for a total of 4lbs in two weeks and in one week I lost 1" from my waist and 1.5 " from my hips. I'm well on my way to losing the 25 lbs!

This is my 'new' before picture.
I'm 148 lbs down from 152 and have
lost 1.5" from hips and 1" from my waist.
My goal is to reach 125 - 130 lbs. 

I have been doing my Jillian Workouts at the gym so there are no distractions (like cleaning the house or doing laundry).  A young guy  (20's is young for me considering I'll be 41 next month) was working out near me and mentioned he noticed how hard I was working. He said my workout looked intense. My response to him: "If I'm going to workout I'm going to make it count".  At the end of my workout I wished him a good day and he said: "Your workout looked really intense. I'm really impressed!" That made my day coming from someone who looks to be about half my age :) Pay it forward! If you see someone working hard mention it to them and say good work! It may just make their day. It sure made mine.

Weight Watchers vs. Jillian Michael's

It's been a little over 3 years (January 2010) since I started my weight loss journey. I reached my goal weight in May of 2011 (135 lbs). Since then it's been a yoyo and my trend had been going up over the last several months. My current weight is 150 lbs (I was 155 but lost 5lbs over the last few weeks). My goal is to lose the weight I put back on (20 lbs) plus an additional 5 lbs for a weight loss of 25 lbs in total. It's so hard keeping the weight off!!

The strategy I'm now doing this time is different. I've decided to follow Jillian Michael's weight loss program instead of continuing on with Weight Watchers. I lost the 80lbs on Weight Watchers and the program served me well. It forced me to look at portion size, calories (with old points system), fiber, carbs, fat and protein (with the new points plus system).  It changed the way I looked at food. Instead of processed foods I focused on eating a variety of whole fruits, vegetables, legumes, grains and low fat/no fat dairy like greek yogurt. The one fault or problem I had with Weight Watchers is not knowing the amount of calories I was taking in. On the Weight Watchers plan fruits are 'free' meaning they don't count against the daily point allowance. For me that is bad news. I love food and if someone says I can eat as much of something as I want I will :-)  - especially fruit.  I cut back on my fruit intake to no more than 3 pieces of fresh fruit a day. I noticed a difference in not gaining weight and even losing weight but I was still in the dark with my total calorie intake (I'll be explaining the importance of calories in a moment). I tried maintaining two food journals. One for Weight Watchers and one with just basic calorie counting and it was too much for me to handle with being a busy mom, student etc...

While being on Weight Watchers I've trained for various events including a couple half marathons and a marathon along with just wanting to be physically fit. There were times when I felt almost week or tired and it was hard to tell if I was taking in enough or the right ratio of carbs, fat, protein and calories.  Of course I also was eating too many calories (fruit) at times and that slowly only adds more weight. Everything I've studied up to this point in my Health and Exercise Science program (something I'm working on slowly as I'm a busy mom!) all points to calories in vs. calories out. There are no short cuts, or fad diets when it comes to weight loss: Weight Watchers, South Beach, Paleo, Grapefruit diet etc... It all comes down to calories plain and simple. If  you can live on a diet that's strict vegan  or Paleo and it agrees with your body (you feel great) and lifestyle I say go for it! In the end it's all about the calories when it comes to weight loss (as science has proven). 

Who is Weight Watchers good for?

Everyone! I think Weight Watchers is good for anyone who's diet primarily consists of mostly highly processed foods (chips, candy, frozen pizza) and restaurant/fast food fair or someone who doesn't understand portions and has no interest in counting calories. Weight Watchers is simple and easy. I learned how to look at food in a new way (carbs, calories, fat, protein). Weight Watchers changed the way I look at food based on the points system. Food for me was looked at more from a fruit and vegetable stand point, lean meats and low fat dairy than ever before. Can you eat a cheeseburger for lunch? Yes as long as it fits in with your points. I guess being on Weight Watchers, losing 80lbs and starting this blog has led me down the path of studying Health and Exercise Science. Something I am very thankful for!

Some website features: Build your own recipe and much of the tools (points calculator, food database) on the website are also available through the phone application.

Some website cons: Navigation can be a bit confusing sometimes and there seems to be an overload of information everywhere on the website.

Who is Weight Watchers not good for?

I don't think Weight Watchers is good for someone who is a food addict that could go into a fruit binge (fruit is zero points on WW but not zero calories). In my opinion I think Weight Watchers can also be difficult for someone like me who was close to goal weight and exercising a lot. I found it really difficult to figure out just how much I should eat without gaining and still having enough food for my long runs or workouts (even with the activity points). I found this especially difficult when I was training for a marathon (anyone in training for an endurance event should not be trying to lose weight). I felt weak from not eating enough or I would eat too much and gain weight.




Who is Jillian Michael's plan good for?
Everyone! I think Jillian Michael's plan is good for anyone who wants to know the hard numbers of calories in vs. calories out. There is also a tally for how many carbs, protiens, fats, cholesterol, sodium, and sugar displayed next to your calorie total for the day. It's a great tool to see how much I'm eating within each category and if I need to eat more carbs or less protein (based on a persons setting of  balanced, slow or fast oxidizer). Another thing I like about her program is my daily calorie allowance is based on my BMR and is factored into the daily calorie allowance. In addition to calorie counting via an online journal and food database I have a daily workout designed for me. Jillian's workouts have three levels and each one is guaranteed to kick ones butt! What I like about the workouts is that there's both a written explanation and a video clip for how to do each exercise. If there is an exercise that's too difficult you can always do a modification or another exercise that targets that area (abs for example - these modifications are only an option from the website not the phone app as of 5/17/2013). For Jillian's workouts it's based on your own body weight with the use of a step, chair, hand weights, exercise ball, medicine ball and a mat (depending on the exercise or workout - no gym equipment required). I love having a workout schedule figured out for me and it includes a couple days off and a day to do what ever I want for cardio. For Jillian Michael's plan I think it's wonderful. It's a great place for me to start from where I left off on Weight Watchers.


Who is Jillian Michael's plan not good for?
That's a tough one. If you are interested in a weekly support group meeting, Jillian's plan may not be for you. She does offer support online via forums and additional coaching but for some people being in person with others is what they need (face to face contact).  I also envision someone who has never done a push up may need to hire a trainer for a while to be shown form on certain exercises to avoid injury. Jillian does a great job showing what not to do in her video clips however there is no replacement for having a person physically there observing you and helping you. I also think for a first time exerciser her workouts may feel a bit intimidating. However if you've seen the show The Biggest Loser and are ready to get really serious this is for you. Her program is no joke but you get results!

Some website features: Super easy and fast to navigate. Great display of calories consumed, calories left and calories burned during her workouts. Excellent modifications or recommendations for exercises (I've had to modify as I can't do some of the advanced exercises but I'm working on it ). Phone app has an excellent workout program including a video of Jillian demonstrating each exercise. If you can't find a food in the database you can create your own food. If you don't have the time to find an item in the food database you can always quick add the calories you consumed.

Some website cons: The modifications for each exercise can't be seen on the phone app like on the website. Haven't been able to yet figure out how to build my own recipes like on WW website. The food database isn't as big as WW but you will find all your whole foods on the list.


In conclusion......

Having said my opinions would I tell someone not to do one vs. the other?
Absolutely not! Everyone is an individual and needs to do what's right for them. What's a good fit for them may not be a good fit for someone else. Weight Watchers was a great fit for me and I lost 80lbs. Now what works the best for me now is Jillian's program. Something I can see myself sustaining for years to come. I've been on Jillian's plan for a little over a week and I've lost 2 lbs to date. I'm on my way to losing the weight I regained.

No matter what plan you choose the fact that you are making an effort and dedicating real time and effort to better health and fitness is a step in the right direction. Calories in vs. Calories out.

Exercise and Stress

In my previous post I mentioned how I'm no longer signing up for events as it was becoming a stressor for me to train for these events. I'm writing this post in the hopes of helping people figure out what is a good stress vs. a bad stress when it comes to exercise.

A picture taken at a FitAthalon
I participated in. And LOVED!

Lets face it everyone (or most everyone by human nature) likes to take the easy way. Case in point if you could be healthy by either sitting on the couch eating a bowl of ice cream or sweating during a run outside most people would probably pick the bowl of ice cream vs the run as it's more pleasurable. Unfortunately that's not a reality. If being healthy meant eating a bowl of ice cream we all would be fit and trim in this country. That is something the diet/food industry knows or prays upon so we have the latest fad diets along with weight loss pills and fat free, low fat, processed foods in the grocery store. These are illusions that are the answers to our weight loss prayers.

Unfortunately there is no easy way out when it comes to losing weight and being fit. But fortunately we can control what we eat and how much we move. That is something we can't buy on a shelf or in a weight loss plan.

When it comes to moving our bodies there are many benefits to exercise.

Here are just a few:
Lowers blood pressure.
Releases endorphins that help lift your mood.
Conditions your cardiovascular system.
Builds muscle and burns fat.
Helps prevent bone loss.
Stress reliever.
Sleep better.
Decreases appetite.
Helps maintain a healthy weight.
Helps in weight loss and therefore lowering risk for certain diseases like diabetes.

Before every workout there's a part of me that's not looking forward to it but I do it anyways because I know how I will feel during and after my workout. Once I start running for example the endorphins start flowing and I feel 'normal' when it comes to my depression symptoms and even great in most cases. After my run I feel a sense of accomplishment that lasts me for a good part of the day if not all day.

When a particular routine or workout isn't working for me I hate it from the moment I start to the moment I finish. I have no joyful sense of accomplishment afterwords and some anxiety is in the midst of the experience. That's what happened to me a week ago when training for an event (the event is a duathlon that takes place in one week) and I of course decided to drop out of the event. It's something I initially signed up for enthusiastically but since then things have changed. I'll be collecting my T-shirt and rooting my friend on from the sidelines.

Typically a bad workout doesn't happen. Most of my workouts (the Jillian workouts are fantastic by the way!) I enjoy and find challenging in a good stressor kind of way. While I initally may not feel particularly excited to sweat or exert myself I feel great during and after my workouts (there's no bad stress).

If you find yourself being stressed in a bad way about a particular type of exercise change it up. There are so many activities and workout routines to chose from. Keep working at it until you find one that works for you. Life is too short to be doing something you hate!

Working It Out

A beautiful view on a spring run!

As I write this I'm sitting on the couch with the  TV on for some background noise. It's been a month since my last post and life has been very busy. My 7 year old has something to go to 4 out of 5 days/nights of the week so our dinner time is very rushed along with bed time and helping my son with his homework.

My spirits in general are ok. I'm missing my dogs Mocha and Java. I can't count how many times I when I get home and I feel a rushed feeling of needing to let them out and then I remember they aren't here. When it comes to progress in my life I feel like things are moving at a painfully slow pace since November. My short term memory is spotty at times and it's hard to really know why or what's causing it. I guess the big lesson in all this is patience.

For exercise I'm backing off of signing up for any more races. I'm feeling that I've burned myself out and I don't need to be signed up for a half marathon to be in shape or to exercise. Training for an event takes time and it's something I don't have much of these days with family commitments. A training schedule for me was starting to become a chore and a stressor instead of an outlet or level of achievement  When exercise becomes a stressor it's time to change things up and do something different.

I've decided as of yesterday to try a new focus and new approach to weight loss. Everything I've learned in my program at school to date (Health and Exercise Science) has been of great use. The most valuable piece of information I have learned when it comes to weight loss is that no matter what type of foods or diet you are on (Vegan, Paleo, Weight Watchers, South Beach) it all comes down to calories. We lose weight when we have a calorie deficit (3,500 calorie deficit per week = 1lb weight loss per week). Weight Watchers is what I used to lose 80lbs on and I'm happy about that but since then I've gained 20lbs of it back due to my own eating and not being diligent about balancing my intake with my calorie burn. I'm a person that needs to know the hard facts so I've decided to count my calories and get a personal trainer (Jillian Michael) to take out the guess work of weight loss.  There are many apps out there and I've decided to use  Jillian Michael's app. Why? because I love her video examples and the workout plans that are set up for me (there are always modifications for each exercise). [I've also tried free apps and while this one is a paid subscription it seems to be the most complete and easiest to use]There is also a food diary to keep track of my calories based on my BMR and it factors in my calories burned doing Jillian's workouts (there's also varying levels to choose from in the workouts and I'm trying level 2 based on my current level of fitness). I find the app very user friendly and very easy to customize. I'll keep you all updated on my progress here at Sonya's Losing It.

Current weight 152lbs
Target weight 130lbs

Miss Mocha

I was planning on this post being about how I gained 6lbs over the loss of our dog Java and how I'm now working on losing that weight. However I just got back from the vets and I find it helps to write so here I am. I am writing this blog post as I sit on my couch with a cup of coffee, my laptop and my 7 yr. old who's sitting next to me sucking on a lollipop and watching a program on Netflix.

Today isn't a teacher work day or a holiday but a day I am giving my son to help him grieve.  We had to euthanize our dog Mocha this morning (the second of two dogs in three weeks - Java was euthanized three weeks ago).

When Java passed it felt a little less painful as we had Mocha to come home to. Now there are no dogs in our home and it feels a little less lively and a little more quiet. It was hard walking into our home and not having either Mocha or Java there to great us. It's going to be difficult over the next few days as I find dog toys or as I walk past the dog bed that sits in our living room. Dinner time is going to feel a little more empty. Mocha used to lay down underneath the dinner table waiting for food to fall and hit the floor (dogs are great at picking up spills and food from kids).

I think back to the days when my husband and I first got Mocha. My husband and I had been dating for a year and lived together. We got Mocha (and Java) from a breeder in Pennsylvania.  At the time a lot of breeders didn't have websites but we went to one of the few that did and the closest breeder I liked was in Pennsylvania so we went on a road trip. We checked out the breeder's set up and where the dogs were housed (the last thing I wanted to do was purchase a dog from a puppy mill). Some weeks later when she was ready to go we picked her up and drove her home. On the way home she refused to sit in the cardboard box lined with a comforter.  Mocha wanted to be with us in the front seat. She spent the entire ride home on the arm rest between us or on the floor of the car behind my seat. She always loved being with us where ever we were. When ever we came home she was always there to greet us and made for a good watch dog.

Mocha's personality was very different than Java's. Mocha was calmer than Java and beyond focused when it came to retrieving anything. My father in law would try to kick a tennis ball past her and she was on it before you could blink. She would have made a good goalie in hockey or soccer LOL!! She also loved playing catch with a Frisbee, swimming, car rides, and snagging any food she could reach on the counter or table. When it came to retrieving she would search for items in the woods via hand signal, voice command or by whistle. We would throw a couple tennis balls out in the woods and send them out to retrieve them. Mocha was very quick to find a tennis ball. She would circle around and then look at us and wait for a signal as to what direction she should go to next. After finding it we would then direct her to help Java find the other one and she always did. She was always really good at retrieving things like shoes and making lovies out of worn socks (we had to make sure everything was picked up).

 Mocha was a very intelligent, funny, loving, food driven dog :-) When she was less than a year old and I was in college she would help me study. She would get up on the couch, lay down and put her paws on the notebook or book I was reading. She was trying to tell me: 'I'm here!' in the most subtle of ways. In her older years when I had my children she was the most gentle loving dog (Java too) and was so patient with them. My boys were sometimes rough with her when they were toddlers and she never minded.

I remember when I was pregnant with my first born. Mocha would come up to me and sniff my belly (something she never did before). She new something was going on. After I had my baby shower I spent time taking the tags off of baby clothes and blankets. Upon my return of putting the tags in the trash she laid on top of the pile of towels, blankets, clothes and fell asleep. Something she had never done before and had never done since then in all my years of folding laundry.

There are so many great memories of her and I plan to carry them with me. We will be honoring her death and Java's with a ceremony at home as a family. We will miss her always.

Contemplating

Thought For Today:
My choices will change my world
and it's up to me to make
the right choices.

This morning I awoke to my alarm at 6 am. I got up used the bathroom and then stood in my bedroom contemplating if I was going back to bed. I decided to lay back down and then my mind started cycling ahead about the consequences of going back to bed. My plans were to attend the 7 am spin class at the local gym. I then started thinking about how bad I would feel if I didn't go to the class. Not going would lead to not feeling great about missing the class which would then lead to falling into food temptations. I'm an all or nothing type person (something I'm working on changing) and not going to spin would turn into a tailspin of eating - "why not eat everything?" - I said to myself. I would either go all the way with exercising and eating well or I wasn't going to do any of it.  The last time I didn't eat well I gained 6 lbs over the loss of my dog Java. With weight gain I really feel the consequences in my running and exercise. I run really s l o w and my stamina isn't where it used to be. My body has to work that much harder to move when carrying that extra weight.

I then got out of bed and stood in my room saying in my mind: "should I or shouldn't I?".

I finally made the decision that I was going to go to spin.
And I did.
And it was worth it.

And as always I never regret doing a workout. EVER.

Today was a small victory or a step in the right direction and I'm just going to keep going .....

No matter what!

Lovely, Lively Java

Today (Monday March 11th) I made the hardest phone call ever.  I had to schedule an appointment to have our beloved Java euthanized today.

All of this started late Thursday afternoon.  She was limping and lifting her right rear leg.  We initially thought it might be a sprain so we gave her an aspirin and decided to call the vet early the next morning. At 2 am we awoke to her whimpering as she was trying to stand so my husband picked her up and brought her outside to do her 'business'.  There were 6 inches of snow on the ground at that time and the snow was still falling. I watched from the window as she hopped around on three legs to find her 'spot'.  She eventually 'hopped' out of sight so I waited by the door for her.  I waited 10 minutes and didn't see her return so I started to worry.  Our property is thickly wooded with forest behind our home and it was anyone's guess as to where she was.  I put on my boots and coat and headed outside to find her.  Thankfully with the snow I was able to follow her tracks and see my way with the contrast of white from the snow.  She ended up hopping her way into the woods and I found her laying down.  My husband picked her up and brought her inside.  Later that morning we called the vet and got an appointment for later that afternoon as we figured the roads would be relatively safe to travel (we got a total of 15 inches of snow so there was a lot of clean up work).

A very old picture of my 'old body'
with Java as a puppy.

The vet was great at explaining to us and our boys what was going on with Java in kid friendly terms. We looked at Java's x-ray and learned that she had arthritis in her spine and a pinched nerve as a result of the arthritis in her spine.  Because of her age and condition an operation was out of the question.  The only option was steroids to help her pinched nerve and we would see how she was on Monday. Of course Monday arrived and there's no improvement. Something I'm saddened by but understand as she is 14 yrs old.

I've been eating a lot during the last several days for comfort due to stress and sadness.  As I sit here typing our beloved family dog Java lived her last day and will be forever missed. She is a 14 year old chocolate lab and is one of two family pets (our other dog is Mocha). Her last days were spent being lavished with attention and food. My husband went out and bought a steak and grilled it for her. I gave her lots of dog cookies smothered in peanut butter. We wanted to keep her as comfortable as possible and gave her lots of loving attention.

The phone call was the hardest thing to do this morning.  Making an appointment to have a friend and family member euthanized is by far the hardest emotional experience I've ever had in my 40 1/2 years of life.   We are all sad and the last few days have been difficult. My 7 yr old was crying on and off this weekend and he made the decision to go with us to see Java euthanized. The vet that we brought her to was very kind. She gave Java one shot to sedate her.  While she was sedated we had our time and privacy to say goodbye. The second injection was what stopped her heart. It was a peaceful passing. She is no longer in pain.

I have so many memories of her over the past 14 years. My husband and I got both our dogs when we were living together before marriage and kids. I tell my boys that our girls Mocha and Java were mommies first babies with four legs :-).

Java's character was very unique. Besides her 'stuffed animal like' soft silky coat she was a dog that was the eternal puppy that often had a 'dear in the headlights' kind of look in her eyes. She also had 'a tail that wagged the dog'. Her body wiggled seemingly uncontrollably when we would come home. She also loved to play fetch and swim. She was a dog that loved to dive to the bottom of streams, lakes, and ponds looking for rocks. She was a 'scuba dog'. It was a behavior she learned on her own. She would surface dive and come out of the water with a rock the size of her head.  Many times the rock was so heavy her rear legs would lift off the ground as she pranced her way out of the water with her new found treasure. She was also known as the escape artist in the family. The funny part about being an escape artist is she had a very unassuming expression. She had an 'empty headed look' in her eyes but she was our little Houdini. She escaped from every pen we ever put her in (The Invisible Fence we finally ended up getting is 100% dog proof ). Besides digging under a fence she could also scale a chain link fence and jump over the top as she got close to the top rail. She also had the talent of being able to climb a latter and would retrieve anything via hand command, verbal command or by whistle in any terrain or environment. One of the funniest memories I have of her is she shredded one of our coffee table books: 101 Uses For A Lab. She was a 'one of a kind dog'. Other mischief she used to get into was digging holes in my garden and eating flower bulbs that I planted. Nothing seemed to be off limits when it came to her appetite.  Probably the most odd thing she ever ate was gypsum board.  She dug and clawed at the walls in the finished basement of the duplex we lived in years ago.  She almost made it to the neighbors on the other side. I can only imagine what our neighbor was thinking when he heard grinding and scratching on the other side of the wall. I had visions of her one day making it through and popping her head out the other side.  Kind of like Jack Nicholson in the movie The Shinning. Needless to say my husband and I became experts at patching gyp board. One other odd thing she ate (along with her accomplice Mocha) was a cantaloupe. I purchased a cantaloupe and placed it on the counter for safe keeping (so I thought). When I went to go slice it up I couldn't find it anywhere in the kitchen. I did however find the evidence in the living room. No rind and no stains or juice on the carpet just three little seeds. Last but not least she had an odd but funny behavior of licking feet. Every night she would go into my sons room and lick his feet - something my 7 yr old enjoyed and now misses at bedtime.

Our first born enjoying Mocha and Java.

The house is more quiet and a little less lively now. I have memories of her mixed in with a boat load of sadness. I never realized how sad it could be to lose a family member and a friend of the K9 variety. When we first had our dogs I had in the back of my mind what it would be like when they were gone and I would get choked up. It's something that I'm sure every dog owner thinks about and is the one downside of dog ownership. Knowing that someday you are going to have to say goodbye.  Goodbye to a friend that has been there for you unconditionally for many years and was always there to greet you when you come home with their tail wagging uncontrollably while they sing to you in a dog like whimper because they are so excited to see you. Anything can happen in a moment of time and I feel like I'm in a state of disbelief that everything seemed to happen so quickly from the time she fell ill to the time she passed away. In about a week we will be able to pick up her ashes that will be in a pottery urn with an impression of her paw on it. I'm looking forward to getting it to bring home.

A few positive things things I can gather from this experience is the strength and love of my 7 yr old and of my husband.  My 7 yr old opted to be with Java in her last moments and of course cried and was sad but in a very mature way (our 3 yr old wasn't emotionally mature to handle witnessing it in my opinion). We were there together crying and holding one another. Getting through that painful moment as we will continue to do so as time passes on.  My 7 yr old has Java's funeral planned and wants to have a family party in her honor and wants to decorate a stone to put in our garden because he said it would be beautiful. In addition he wants to put together a memory board with pictures of her for display at the party. It's only been a short time since Java's passing and my 7 yr old is very upset at times and finds moments of difficulty in school as he feels overwhelmed with sadness (much the way I've been feeling along with my husband). I'm so lucky to have amazing sensitive children that are ok with expressing their emotions and sadness. We will always love her and miss her. Our friend, our family member, our lovely, lively Java. Our memories of her will be with us always.