Friday, November 15, 2013

Three Weeks Post Op...

It seems like light years have passed since my previous post. I tend to let some time pass in between postings. I'm generally thinking in the back of my mind what I'm going to write about while my life happens. There's so much I want to say but I only have a limited amount of time between school, being a mom and trying to keep my house from looking like a total disaster.

Since my previous post I've officially met my goal (how odd that sounds to me right now) with diet bet and won $49 and change. I'll take it!

As for surgery I'm now three weeks post op. The operation (diskectomy) wasn't as bad as I originally thought and I felt relieved the day before and the day of the surgery knowing that it would soon be over with.  The first 12 days post op I had no pain (thanks to meds and Advil). I had great support from my husband, friends and family. I was able to rest and I felt great. So great in fact that after twelve days I took it upon myself to shop for two hours and then my back started to ache. I just have to remind myself that it's ok to take baby steps and even though I may be feeling great I should still take it slow and easy for a little while.

Unfortunately with all the healing/rest, eating, and no exercise it makes it easy to pack on the pounds. This is the heaviest I've been in a really long time :-( Unfortunately it's too easy to have a pity party for myself and that of course only compounds my issues. I look back at a year ago when I ran 26.2 miles and I feel like I'm decades away from that point in time. I feel like a bloated whale. My clothes don't fit like they should and I'm up two pants sizes (I promised myself I would never see the number on the scale that I see today) :-( . I'm not running with the Saturday morning group of friends that I used to and I'm out of a routine. The icing on the cake is my closest and dearest friend moved to the other side of the U.S. and there's a big hole that is now there and I'm not sure it will ever be filled. I'm also stressing about school and what next semester will look like for me. In addition I'm also not sleeping well. The first chunk of sleep at night lasts about four hours then I'm awake for an hour or two before I can doze and get some more wakeful sleep. I need to: figure out next semester, get back into an exercise routine and count calories.

Now that I've witched about how crappy I feel I need to balance the equation out. In the spirit of the Holiday of Thanksgiving I can say: I have two legs. I may not be able to run yet (fingers crossed) but I can walk, ride a bike and start a new exercise routine that works around my back surgery.

I tried spin for the first time this morning since the surgery and I was successful in a seated only position. Last but not least I get to hug and kiss my boys every night.

I'm going to keep on looking at the positives in my life and eventually my feelings will turn around. One small step at a time. 

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