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174.6 lbs

Last Monday I gained. .6 lbs .

Time to move on.

I've been dreading posting on my blog. I've been keeping track of my calories and I was starting to get back on track with my exercise. I was taking a spin class 3 x a week and one of those classes was a 90 minute class.  In addition I was doing cardio on my own via a spin bike 2 other days for a total of 5 x a week. For weights I was starting to do more upper body work in addition to sit ups and pushups etc...and then I pushed myself too hard. I was doing a combination of two exercises. I was laying on a bench with my butt at the edge. I was doing leg lifts in combo with a reverse hip lift. I did 25 of these combinations and then when I went to stand up I felt a twinge in my back. :-/ Since then it's been ice, heat, advil, stretching, PT, muscle relaxers and oxycodone sp? (the prescriptions I had from back surgery in Oct). There is nothing more frustrating than wanting to be able to lose weight, have a great workout and feel strong. I miss my old me (my fit and 4 sizes smaller me). This back injurry happened a week ago and I've been doing my best to make progress and it has been working but I'm worried.

What am I scared of/worried about? That I have a ruptured disc again. I have pain from my sciatic nerve that is running down my hip all the way down my leg. Very similar to how it felt when I ruptured my disc last year leading to surgery in October. I have an appointment tomorrow with my Dr. so we'll see where I go from there. In the mean time I'm going to try and do things differently. I'm going to try swimming (yay! I get to shop for a swim suit! :-/ ). Something I've been holding off for a long time. In my mind (I'm studing Health and Exercise Science) I know what is best for me but I'm my own worst enemy. Panic and anxiety sets in once I get past the line in the pool that goes from shallow to deep. I feel like I can't swim fast enough to get to the edge of the pool. Something I'm going to work on as my body is craving the endorphins from cardio and a full body workout. Swimming seems to be the best bet for a no impact full body workout however I have some work to do. More mental work than anything. I'm not sure if I'm going to get some swim instructions or a personal trainer. I need to keep moving forward even thought I feel like it's one step forward two steps back. I can't give up.

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