Thursday, June 5, 2014

Life

It's been forever since my last post. I've often thought about things I would like to write about but somehow life gets in the way. It feels like I have a million things I want to accomplish but there are only so many hours in a day. Today I had a Drs. appointment and he asked me what my plans were after the surgery (something that has developed since my last post). I told him my plan is to get back to where I want to be physically.

Rewind.....
Over a month ago I had a nasty sinus infection and chest cold. During that time I didn't do any cardio due to a my lung capacity. I was coughing for about a month (which only made my leg hurt more as it push pressure on the nerve). I vowed to go back to taking spin on Friday mornings once I felt ok but my leg pain has been acting up more (especially during the coughing episode - thankfully I'm not coughing but it doesn't take much to aggravate the nerve.).

I finished physical therapy about a month + ago and it was recommended I get an x ray and an MRI. The x ray of course didn't show anything but the MRI did. I have a ruptured disc L4-5. Surgery is in a couple weeks and I can't wait to get this done. As I told the doctor today I want to get back to my fit self. I've been doing lots of comfort eating knowing I shouldn't but frankly I don't really care at this point. I know what it takes to lose the weight and I will get there. I will do it again. I know I can.

On my way home from the Drs. today I heard about a car accident where a husband and wife died. They had just dropped off their child at daycare when the accident happened. It saddens me to think about what their child must be going through today knowing that his/her parents are dead. I can't imagine how horrible it will be for the person who has to tell the child what has happened. Gone forever. It's moments like this that make me want to hug my boys that much more. It also puts in perspective how lucky I am. I may see myself as fat but I have so much to be thankful for. I have hope. I may never run again but fingers crossed I will. If I can't run then I will count my blessings. It just means my course has changed and I need to figure out a new plan. I need to put down the spoon and pint of self pity and start again.

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